The Observations of a Non-Video-Gamer

[Nover]

I am a video-gamer, but I have nothing else to call this. Just a little journal I type out while my little brother is playing video games. If you guys enjoy it I can make it a series.

Today my brother is “practicing” the ever so famous Wii game, Super Mario Smash Bros. Brawl. He hasn’t played THIS game in quite a while. The way he put it, he needs “brush up on his skills” so he can “pass a test” to be initiated into a “clan”. Apparently, these said “clans” are everywhere on the internet, they fight with each other all the time over Wi-Fi. I don’t really know what purpose they serve other than that.
So in order to practice, he needs to keep battling over Wi-Fi until he finds his best character. Once he does this, he then needs to keep battling again and again until he has completely mastered said character. Right now he’s playing as Olimar. I had NEVER heard of this little freak until this game came out, apparently he has his own video game just like the rest of the characters. He carries around his little buddies, better known as “Pikmin” and throws them at people. Some friend to them HE is.
NOW he’s going to play as Samus after an embarrassing last place with Olimar. Samus is famous from the Metroid games. I’ve really always wondered how she manages to fit into that little ball she rolls around in. Is that the armor, or is she just REALLY flexible? He just finished second next to Sonic the Hedgehog. In my opinion, Sonic is SO beast. His only real tool in this game is speed, and by the looks of it he has a rather difficult learning curve, but gosh la wash if you know him and master him, that little not-so-fuzzy talking animal we all know and love is a force to be reckoned with.
My brother is now playing as my least favorite character of all. Link, from the Zelda games. I’m not saying he’s bad. But in my humble opinion, he has one of the easiest learning curves, and is EXTREMELY mainstream. He’s been in these games from the start, and everyone ALWAYS uses him, and no matter what, even if the user sucks, they always win because of the user-friendly learning curve.
One thing that’s always interested me is that they’ve stuck with the idea of being able to change your characters colors. Don’t get me wrong, a blue Pikachu or a yellow Kirby, that’s kick-butt. But a pink Zelda…that’s just plain defacement of everything Zelda. Another thing I always wonder why they did was the addition of the Pokémon character. I mean, c’mon. You know you’re desperate for marketing when you mix one of Japanese Anime’s most famous cartoons into one of America’s most comically violent video games. Now the Lucario character I’m fine with, but the Pokémon Trainer, I just find kind of weird.
Speaking of Lucario, my bro is playing as him now. His strategy for this battle seems generally easy. Avoid all contact no matter what. Too bad it didn’t work; he came in second behind, guess who, the Pokémon Trainer. Now he’s playing as Wolf…who if I remember correctly is a new character…from the Steel Fox games or something. His power attack (brawl ball?!) is one of the lamest ever. He drives around a tank and tries to run over the opposing characters. That’s got to be right up there with the big cooking pot that Kirby uses.
One thing I DO like about this Wi-Fi is that while waiting for other players to join the game, you have a little practice session with a punching bag that just sits there and takes as much damage as it takes to knock him off the platform. You can keep hitting him up and up until it takes up to a minute for it to come back down. Then you hit it again. One thing I’m not fond of at all is the lag. Also known as when you’re in the middle of a game and it suddenly starts running REALLY slow for you, but not for the other players.
So while my brother and his Mario character sit there like a bump on a log, the other players are beating the living poop out of him. The even worse thing about lag is even though you’re taking a pounding it takes a butt-load of time for you to die. Finally the lag has ended, and this obnoxious music can be covered up with the sound of breaking bones and cheering crowds. Unfortunately, he lost. 2nd place again! At least he still has the punching bag behind him in the rankings.
The next battle has started, and Ganondorf just blew my brother’s Mario sky-high. Ganondorf is another character who I think is over-used. At least when a user sucks, the character sucks too, unlike the Link situation. This time, Mario makes it to SUDDEN DEATH before he’s demolished! Congrats, little bro!
This time he’s playing as Falco, another Star Fox character. I think he might actually win, but only because he used his tank to run over several people. One of them being Pikachu with a green headband. THAT’S kick-butt. Since Falco DID end up winning, he’ll use him again. Except this time with no tank. It’s not surprising that when people win by popping a ball and exploding everyone into a million pieces, they consider themselves “good”.
Well, as his second round with Falco wraps up and kick-butt green headband Pikachu wins, it looks like I’m done for now. I’ll be back later with more observations of the non-video-gamer. Adios, everyone.

[Chef]

...Link? ...easy learning curve? Those words do not belong in the same sentence. What game are you playing?

[Kr!sP]

Originally Posted by Chef Tragic

...Link? ...easy learning curve? Those words do not belong in the same sentence. What game are you playing?

Exactly, you seem pretty new to smash so I'm just putting this out there. Link sucks, he has a learning curve not beginner friendly at all. Those projectiles aren't easy to use and even with them he falls short to other characters. Tel your brother if he wants to learn someone without years of competitive play, Metaknight+twitchy finger over C-stick=win.

[Jarrett]

Originally Posted by Kr!sP

Exactly, you seem pretty new to smash so I'm just putting this out there. Link sucks, he has a learning curve not beginner friendly at all. Those projectiles aren't easy to use and even with them he falls short to other characters. Tel your brother if he wants to learn someone without years of competitive play, Metaknight+twitchy finger over C-stick=win.

Don't encourage that faggotry. :@

[GuruSharky]

Link does not have an easy learning curve in my opinion, I personally suck with link and he is one of my worst characters.

And basically no one uses ganondorf, Ive only met very few ppl who do besides me. I love to use G-Dorf.

But otherwise i like it lol, especially the part about clans, cuz I personally hate them after being in 2 and running 1. I am no longer a "clanie"

[Frosty the Froman]

Chef...Kr!sP...after everything that said, the only thing you're thinking about is what he said about Link!?

Of course he's new(unless he was just trying to be funny)! He said Super MARIO Smash Brothers!

Did you really just complain about a pink Zelda?...

[Bloodmeta]

Originally Posted by Kr!sP

Exactly, you seem pretty new to smash so I'm just putting this out there. Link sucks, he has a learning curve not beginner friendly at all. Those projectiles aren't easy to use and even with them he falls short to other characters. Tel your brother if he wants to learn someone without years of competitive play, Metaknight+twitchy finger over C-stick=win.

Originally Posted by GuruSharky

Link does not have an easy learning curve in my opinion, I personally suck with link and he is one of my worst characters. And basically no one uses ganondork, Ive only met very few ppl who do besides me. I love to use G-Dork. (Fixed ) But otherwise i like it lol, especially the part about clans, cuz I personally hate them after being in 2 and running 1. I am no longer a "clanie"

;-;...
Actually, Link Isn't One Of The Worst Characters, Infact, He's One Of The Best Characters In Brawl, If You Know How To Use Him, Of Course...

And Your Also Right GuruSharky, Link Does Take A Long Time To Get Used To. Look At Me, It Took Me Six Years...

Six FREAKING Years To Master Link, And Now, I'm A Pro With Him

But Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover, And Even If You Use Link, It Takes A LOOOONG Time To Master Him, Plus I Had To Make All These Combos, Strategies, Etc. Just For Link...

Mastering Link Isn't A Cakewalk At All... Infact, He's One Of The Hardest Characters To Master On All Super Smash Brother Games Oh And Also... MetaKnight Is God-Tier... Unless You Don't Want Any Friends In Wifi... Then Don't Use MK

[Tecno Snake]

Off the bat i must say i must be a Link natural, i mastered him in the original and the skill just carries over every game.
Next order 0f business. I thought this was funny with all the backwards insite and purposefull mistakes. If i wasnt sure you played games i might think you didnt. I wanna see more.
[I am aware this is old.]

[marknelson]

Hi,

I am a non video gamer and thanks for your info. But i like to play xbox 360.